Guilt and shame are heavy, heavy burdens.

They are like shackles on our feet. They hold us back from moving forward, past our past.

They weigh you down to the point that you stay put because you just don’t see a way of moving forward, you don’t even feel worthy of anything good.

I shared a story this week at our ministry night downtown with the women in recovery that we work with. It was a story of a complete mom fail that I had earlier in the day. The kind that make you think you aren’t even worthy of being a mother in the first place. I’m sure I am not the only one who has had one of those days.

While everything turned out alright, I was acutely aware of the magnitude of my mistake and how fortunate I was that my two- year- old did not get seriously injured or worse. After it happened, I couldn’t help but hear the recording in my head over and over again of the enemy just tearing me down. “See, this is why you can’t have any more children, you can’t even take care of the one’s you have,” and “Only a horrible mother would have allowed that to happen.” Over and over again, dagger after dagger. And then after about 30 minutes, I felt like God just said, “Stop it. Just Stop. It was a mistake, you aren’t perfect. Learn from it and move on.”

I had a decision to make. I could dwell in the shame of my mistake; or, I could ask for forgiveness, learn from it and move on.

I took a break from the negative thoughts and humbly asked God for forgiveness and started to replace the lies with truth. I remembered that yes, I am human and accidents happen. I remembered that my worth does not come from never making a mistake. It comes from the Grace of my Heavenly Father. I knew I had to learn from what happened. I had to realize that my now very curious and mischievous just-turned-two-year-old is much quicker than I give her credit for. And I am grateful for God’s new mercies every morning.

I shared that story with the women because I know that some of them are still walking around in the shackles of their past mistakes, in particular, the ones that affected their children. Even though they have made the decision to get well, they are still shackled to that shame. I reminded them that God the Father is our Redeemer. When we humbly ask for forgiveness and repent, He forgives AND He forgets. Get that last part- He forgets.  As far as the east is from the west, He remembers our sin no more. It is US that carry around the shame and guilt long after we have asked for forgiveness. It is us that forget to shake off the shackles and walk in the freedom that Jesus died that brutal death to give us.

See we can’t move on if we don’t let go of that shame and forgive ourselves. And friends, there is so much more freedom in this life than dragging around the shackles and chains of our past. None of us are perfect, not even close. And that is not news to God. It is why He sent us a Savior. And for that I am forever grateful.

So just like I had a decision to make that day- to dwell, beat myself up, degrade myself for my mistake OR to ask for forgiveness, learn from it, improve and move on. Friends, you HAVE to do the same. Fight the enemy with truth.

It’s time to show shame the door.

Hebrews 8:12